My New Found Glory Review - Finding Wonderland

“But I don't want to go among mad people,” said Alice. "Oh, you can't help that," said the cat. "We're all mad here.” - Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland.

WELL HELLO PUSSYCATS!!!  MEOW!!!  LET ME TELL YOU… it’s been a loooooong time since Little Miss Misanthrope has suffered from two blown-to-smithereens eardrums and complete exhaustion of the gluteus maximus-es from attempting the pop punk signature pogo stick dance move for five non-stop hours of popping pleasure, but hey hey hey, it was well worth the suffering as yours truly has now stumbled upon the melodic madness that’s been absent from her life for the past twelve blasted years!  Say, a magical moment of musical mayhem, a rowdy release from the iron grip of a bloated brainy brain squeezed within a wench press world, or perhaps it was finding a glorious newfound freedom that was lost somewhere between the blank pages of my oh-so-blahsville adult life?  Whatever you call it, suffice it to say that on April 26, 2009 the popes of pop-punk, New Found Glory, rocked my world!  (And definitely rang my bell.)  And still half deaf, allow your favorite ding-a-ling to fill you in on what you missed if you weren’t one of the 1,200 or so fabulously lucky punk partying patrons.  “Say what?” 

“There is no use trying,” said Alice; “one can't believe impossible things.”  “I dare say you haven't had much practice,” said the Queen.  “When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” - Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland.

Breakfast?  Who has time for cookin’ up crumpets when were talking IMPOSSIBLE THINGS?  And by that, I mean sitting down one on one and sharing a mystical moment with one of America’s finest piece a… abstract expressionism, Jordan Pundik, the professional punk lead vocalist for New Found Glory.  This was the moment yours truly, Dr. Strangelove, had been waiting for…  (maniacal laughter) an opportunity to dissect an interesting little punk-pounding psyche in a contrived effort to find out what makes such a talented rocker tick, tick, boom.  Like an expert cinematographer scanning the landscape of ubiquity for that magic shot, I reeled in my reservations and commenced to focus upon my surprisingly acquiescent (downright picture perfect) and model subject.  With admiration, I gave him the once over and raised him up for a snapshot, I won’t soon forget.

Chick Chop Suey:  “Real quick, for those who might not already be familiar with your music, describe New Found Glory in terms of blockbuster movie titles.”

Jordan:  (laughing and quick to answer) “I would say that (our music/NFG) could be likened to… Starship Troopers meets Big Trouble Little China.”

Chick Chop Suey:  (Ah-ha!  This one’s got some foxy-moxy.  Mental note:  rent Starship Troopers to find out what in the sam-hell he’s talking about.  Next.) 

“Moving on, I’m all over big breaks.  Incidentally, I am counting on the fact that I am going to catch one myself.  And to tell you the truth, big dreamers like me need to know… well… that the impossible really does happen.  When did the big break happen for New Found Glory?”

Jordan:  “We started playing together in high school.  And as a group, we didn’t get signed until later… for us, success was really word of mouth.  It was hard work but, it was our persistence that made it for us… and the fans.”

Chick Chop Suey:  (shocked, as I have a healthy fantasy surrounds big wig agents – don’t ask.)  “So it wasn’t like some big agent came in to your lives and turned on the lights for NFG and delivered fame and fortune to your doorstep.”

Jordan:  “No, not at all, I mean I know that happens… record labels go out and scout new bands… but in our case, we rented a Ryder Truck and just started playing shows from Florida to New Jersey… to… wherever.  For us, it was all about just getting our music in front of as many people as possible.  And the fans - they were loyal.  That helped a lot.”

Chick Chop Suey:  “I was snooping around like the D-O double G that I am and came across your Myspace page- getting totally demoralized as I took notice of just how many kids out there are trying to get noticed, desperately trying to make it in the music industry.  There’s so many of them.  With so much competition out there, is harder nowadays to make it?”

Jordan:  “No, it’s easier now.  People get their work out there and develop a fan base over the internet…  The most important thing is that you have to be true to who you are.”

Chick Chop Suey:  “Do you ever see yourself helping the new guys out?  Developing bands that you think have potential?”

Jordan:  “Yeah, absolutely!  We already do.  For instance Chad (Gilbert) just produced Fireworks’ new album… and we also collaborate and write songs (with other bands/new talent).”

Chick Chop Suey:  “I have a friend who has been trying to catch a break within the music industry for years.  So far, he hasn’t really been able to make it.  Did you ever have a timeline in place to benchmark success… like for instance saying to yourself, if at this point I don’t make it… then I will quit and do this other thing?”

Jordan:  “No.  We didn’t think about that, we just went out there and did it.”

Chick Chop Suey:  “Did you have a backup plan if things didn’t work out?  What would you have done if NFG never rose to the top?”

Jordan:  “I guess if it didn’t work out, I would’ve gone to college or something… but that was never really a thought that crossed my mind.”

Chick Chop Suey:  “Detroit is in the dumpsville, man.  Many people are loosing their jobs, homes, etc. and being forced to rebuild their careers upon a new foundation… (ME!) to reinvent themselves, which requires that they ditch old ways of thinking.  Like anyone, you guys have gone through your ups and downs.  At your lowest point, what old ways of thinking did you have to give up in order to build New Found Glory upon solid ground?”

Jordan:  “Yeah, I mean we’ve been through tough times.  For us it was always about never giving up and staying true to yourself – staying true to the music.”         

Chick Chop Suey:  “Some believe that there’s such a thing as a curse on rock stars, whereby cause the vast majority of them to die at exactly the age of 27...”

Jordan:  (Kicking back in his chair and putting his hands through his hair. – Distracted as my mind went elsewhere....instead I was snapped back into reality.)  “Really?”

Chick Chop Suey:  (shaking ‘the dirty’ off.)  “Yeah, I guess there was a Phd candidate who wrote his thesis on this subject determining that the death rate at 27 was two times higher than that of any other age.  Now…when asked of his biggest accomplishment to date, the boorish panty-dropper John Mayer answered (in BMI) that it was making it past 27.  So far, what do you feel that your biggest accomplishment as been to date?”

Jordan:  “Getting three gold records was pretty big.  Oh, and the key to Coral Springs.”

Chick Chop Suey:  (Forgetting about the glorious gold records and imagining the far more colorful and twisted mayoral proclamation with New Found Glory.)  “No way, you got the key to Coral Springs?”

Jordan:  “Yeah.”

Chick Chop Suey:  “That’s awesome!”  (moving along) 

“You know I have to ask this… I mean, being a girl’s girl and feeling obligated to speak up for all the single ladies out there looking to score themselves a spicy hot punk-rock-macho-machine.  Throw a dog a bone and tell me, what does a hot diggity dog punk rocker look for in a female counter part?” 

Jordan:  “She has to be fun to be around.”

Chick Chop Suey:  (Encouraging.  Wait!  I’m married.  However, pressing on for the righteous chicks I met outside just before the interview, Kim and Megan, here you go.)  “I read somewhere on the internet that you and Chad are newly single.  That’s true right?”

Jordan:  “No, but Cyrus is (single).”

Chick Chop Suey:  (Ding Ding!!!  A big sunshiny ray of hope! – for the swooning singletons of course.)  “Okay, so what does Cyrus look for in a lady?”

Jordan:  “You’d have to ask him… although, I will say he’s the type that waits for girls to come to him.”

Chick Chop Suey:  (sizing Cyrus up immediately, after all it takes one to know one.)  “Oh, I get it… the mysterious, cool cat hanging out somewhere within the shadows of the party.  I know the type.”  (Cause that’s me!  Don’t blow your cover, girlfriend.) 

“Now, (my big serious question) switching gears… punk rock has a reputation of promoting political anti-establishment agendas within raw, powerful, guiltless self expression.  In fact, your notorious predecessors, the Sex Pistols, were well known for expressing their angst against the social and political conditions of their time.  Given the changing the political system today, do you think politics has a place in your music.  I mean I know that typically you guys write about whatever emotion beguiles you… but…”

Jordan:  “No, we write about our friends, heartaches, love… our family.  And these are the things that affect us; what has impacted our lives…  (We write) what we feel deeply about at the time.  For us it’s not about that (politics).”

Chick Chop Suey:  (Intrigued…)  “So you’re a true Expressionist…”  (A pavement pounding heartbreaker with a rough, wild side… hmmmm…. me likely that spiky.)

Jordan:  “Yeah, I guess if that’s what you want to call it.”  (Absolutely!)

Chick Chop Suey:  (All good things must end…)  “I could talk to you for hours, but I guess I should wrap this up… Finally, where do see yourself in ten, twenty years… where do you hope to be?”

Jordan:  (Puts his hands up almost in a circle as if to say, “You’re looking at it!”)  “Doing this, making more gold records, touring and playing for the fans… this is it (our future), this is what we plan on doing for the rest of our lives.”

Chick Chop Suey:  “Right on.”  (But really thinking… You know what?  I sincerely hope that happens, and when it does, good ole Chop Suey’s gonna be there… in a tricked out wheelchair bouncing her hydraulics right along with you…)  “Play on players.”

Alice: Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?
The Cheshire Cat: That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.
Alice: I don't much care where.
The Cheshire Cat: Then it doesn't much matter which way you go.
Alice: …so long as I get somewhere.
The Cheshire Cat: Oh, you're sure to do that, if only you walk long enough.
– Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

I walked out of that little backstage production room all pumped and primed, baby, and ready for the main event.  In fact, I couldn’t wait to see what kind of tricks these fat cats had up there sleeves.  Fortunately, this kitty was down for a real treat… a tasty tune-a-licious treat, that is, as the night commenced to begin with Detroit’s own, little sparklers… Fireworks, followed by the talented Set Your Goals and Bayside (props to Chris Guglielmo).  Oh, the litany of guttural grinding melodies that transpired during my waiting game… some of which appeared to rightly shackle my heart and stir red hot passion into my already aching muscles.  My only regret?  Wearing my king-sized heels… (a big no-no at a punk show, my friends) because intermittently throughout the evening, girlfriend was ready to throw those expensive bad boys aside and dive her robust rump directly into the pubescent party taking place downstage.  If only... I didn’t care so much about… well, breaking my neck.  (Next.)

And then it happened, the moment I had been preparing for… for months.  My adrenaline started rising at the first sight of Jenny, the kindly Barker beauty slash production prodigy, as she appeared onstage preparing our feast.  And steadying my blood pressure, the music started.  I couldn’t help myself!  I inched myself closer to the stage as if to catch the meaty drippings of raw emotion being pumped from Gilbert’s guitar directly into my languid veins.  The energy found a lifeline somewhere within me and it stirred up a connection with a band that I haven’t felt in decades.  I loved it!  Every pea-pickin’ minute of the whole shebang from the beefcake bassist, Ian Grushka (wink-wink) blazing Listen to Your Friends to the amazing vocal collaborations way down the playlist ending with a pinnacle of delight in My Friends Over You.  I was lapping up the milk (Bolooki and Klein’s included.)  And now… yes, I do believe that I get it.  I finally understand why New Found Glory are so adored by their fans.  Because they are authentic!  These scrappers are actually really talented and even better, they deliver knock out punches without even trying.  Shining example:  the amazing well balanced peanut butter and jelly piece perfectly shared between Chad Gilbert on the acoustic guitar and Jordan Pundik on lead vocals.      
 

When it was all over, I realized walking out of the Royal Oak Music Theatre, that I actually wanted to be a wild and sexy pop-punk rock star and not some boring old writer anymore.  Just kidding!  No, I actually realized that I was downright lucky.  Lucky to have been one of the fans, lucky to have heard New Found Glory in their glory, lucky to have stumbled upon such a great scene of amazing people that I didn’t even know existed up until four months ago.  It was almost as if I had witnessed the future:  hope in America… a new found glory being born and bred right in front of me in the form of a whole new generation of bouncing and behaving twitty twit twits.  Who actually aren’t twitty twit twits at all.  Quite the contrary, these baby faced beauties were utterly charming. 

And to be quite honest with you, this Alice is downright smitten with the whole pop-punk wonderland and especially with its talented and precocious co-conspirators, New Found Glory.

"'I wonder if I've been changed in the night?  Let me think:  was I the same when I got up this morning?  I almost think I can remember feeling a little different.  But if I'm not the same, the next question is…  'Who in the world am I?'  Ah, now that's the great puzzle!'"
- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland